Physical abuse often starts out gradually with instances of slapping or pinching and escalates over time becoming more frequent and severe. Physical abuse can occur in a variety of forms such as: hitting, pushing, throwing objects, using a weapon, kicking, biting, scratching, chocking, and physical restraint.

An individual engaging in physical abuse may blame the abuse on their partner. Statements that may be made by the abusive partner are: you made me do this, if you hadn’t done that then I wouldn’t have hit you, and you deserved it. Please know that physical abuse is never caused by the victim and is never deserved.

Abuse often follows a three part cycle:

Tension: The individual engaging in abuse becomes frustrated or dissatisfied due to external stressors such as work, physical illness, or personal relationships. The partner experiencing the abuse becomes fearful that physical abuse will re-occur. During this phase emotional abuse, verbal abuse, or small acts of physical violence such as pinching may occur.

Abuse: An incident of more severe physical abuse typically occurs.

Courting/love: The individual engaging in abusive behaviour expresses love for their partner, apologizes for the abuse, and promises it will never happen again. It is this phase in the cycle that encourages individuals experiencing abuse to remain in an abusive relationship as this phase provides them with hope that their partner will change. After this phase is complete the tension phase starts again.

Physical abuse puts individuals at a higher risk of developing mental health concerns such as anxiety, depression, panic attacks, and post-traumatic stress disorder. Physical abuse also puts individuals at risk for short-term and long-term physical health problems.

If you are in an abusive relationship it is important to make a safety plan for yourself and your children, a therapist can help you create one. If you are planning to leave an abusive partner it is important to speak with a therapist and develop a safe plan for leaving. Women are most at risk of being killed by an abusive partner when attempting to leave the relationship.