Many couples go into marriage without adequate mental preparation of how life together can bring conflicts. Often people are not taught how to talk about the differences in values, goals, and
lifestyles. When couples are confronted with real-life issues, then they start to realize how different they are and doubt whether they marry the wrong person. However, most of the time, marital issues are not about whether the person is right, but whether we dealt with the person in the right way.

Premarital counselling is a preventative measure to discuss potential issues before they surface and proactively work on the relationship while it’s still in good shape. Working on communication is essential in all relationship counselling. Being able to validate each other, give each other positive bids like compliments, empathizing with each other’s feelings are the foundation of fostering any secure emotional connection. Building on that is how to have constructive conflicts and how to resolve conflicts.

All couples have conflicts about their differences. A major part of relationship counselling is to teach couples how to communicate their differences, where the differences come from, and what the
differences mean to each of them. If any differences trigger huge disagreement and strong emotions, they are usually rooted in our cultural beliefs, family values, childhood experiences, and dreams.

Important topics to go through before marriage include: gender roles, family of origin, childhood, finances, sex, children, and spirituality.

Some therapists using compatibility inventory to test the areas where the couple agrees and disagrees. Prominent methods of premarital counselling methods include Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and Gottman Therapy. You can read more on the specific pages regarding these two evidence-based methods.